Nurturing Your Child While Setting Limits

Parenting.  This one word means so much.  Your job as a parent is the most important, frustrating, fantastic, difficult, and rewarding job you will ever have.  Each day, it seems like there is something new to deal with:  a new temper tantrum, a new sickness, a new defiance, a newly learned naughty word… and you are expected to be patient and helpful in times when you don’t think you have any patience or helpfulness left inside of you. But you do. And you do your best to get through those murky moments and come out with new tools in your parenting toolbox to use for the next extraordinary parenting event that arises.  By nurturing and setting boundaries, your work as a parent might even become a little bit easier… over time. 

Read on for more information about how nurturing and setting limits with your child is important.  From the website: centerforparentingeducation.com

The Dual Role of Parents

If you have ever wondered if you are being either too strict or too lenient, or if you are giving your children enough love, then you have stumbled upon considerations about the two important roles that parents have. Each has a part in helping your children become responsible.

Nurturing/Caring Role

When you are carrying out the Nurturing/Caring Role, you are being kind and loving to your children. It is in this role that you listen to your children, support them, spend time with them, and are affectionate with them.

As the Nurturing Parent, you communicate unconditional love – no matter what happens, you love your children just because they exist and are yours. This allows your children to take risks, to make mistakes, knowing that they have their parents’ unconditional support and love.

Structure/Executive Role

When you are fulfilling the responsibilities of the Structure/Executive Role, you are setting limits and boundaries, imposing discipline, teaching your children how they should behave, passing on your values, and giving guidance.

By not meeting their needs immediately and not giving them everything they want, you provide an opportunity for your children to tolerate some frustration, delay gratification, become less impulsive and less self-centered.

You set standards of behavior that you expect your children to meet. You establish consequences for breaking rules and you follow through on those consequences. You teach your children to be appreciative for what they have.

It is through the Executive Role that you hold your children accountable for their behavior, and that in turn, fosters the development of a sense of responsibility.

Dual Roles Combined

Children need their parents to carry out both roles. Children are more likely to accept the limits you set and are more likely to want to meet your expectations (i.e. be responsible) when you provide a warm, caring and supportive relationship that underlies the discipline you impose.

Additional resource:

7 Hints For Setting Boundaries With Your Kids

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/parenting-tips/2012/07/7-hints-for-setting-boundaries-with-your-kids/

Home Visit Information and Tips

Home visits are voluntary, but we highly encourage you to take advantage of this opportunity, as it is such a special process that we offer at PFM! Visiting the home of a student provides the teacher insight on what the child’s interests are and how they interact with family, while also giving them a clearer picture of what the child’s life is like outside of the classroom. The visit usually last 30 minutes. Please be aware that some teachers will be commuting by bus or driving to your homes for the first time and this can cause them to be later than planned. A sign-up sheet will be placed in the lobby soon with dates and times for your child’s teacher to come and visit your home.

Tips for a Successful Home Visit:

It is a good idea to have your child open the door and greet their teacher themselves. Practicing this with your child before the visit is a good idea. It is okay if they turn shy at the last minute and want you to open the door for them.

During the visit you can have things planned such as tea time, a little snack, a tour of the house (you do not have to show every room, just the ones your child uses most). The children usually like to show their teachers their bedroom, and where their toys are kept. Having a special book or toy to show their teacher is always a good idea. This creates an easy opening for communication.

Home visits are not a time to talk about your child’s progress or the issues they may be having in the classroom. Discussions such as these should be scheduled during school hours with your child’s teacher.

Some good topics to discuss are: who your child is playing with, what your child likes to do on the playground, what songs they like to sing, what foods they like to eat at lunch, etc.

When the visit is coming to a close, the teacher will ask to see one last thing and then you can help your child say their goodbyes. A hug and a thank you are always nice ways to end a home visit.

Helping Children Understand Emotions

If you ever wonder how we, as infant, toddler and preschool educators handle all the emotions we see each day from the children while here at school, the answer is simple: we have learned what works!  We use children’s emotions as teaching and learning opportunities to help guide them through their development.  Children’s emotions are a big deal during this time in their lives and labeling emotions and talking about emotions with children is the first step in helping them learn how to deal with anger, sadness, disappointment and confusion.  In order for us to help your child as best as we can here at school, it is helpful if parents are using the same approach at home, too.  It may sound so simple, but the act of doing this successfully takes daily practice and repetition.  The ideas from the following handout can and should be used for all ages of children, even babies!

 

Head of School Newsletter: October

It is officially Fall and at Pacific First Montessori we have begun noticing all of the seasonal changes happening around us: the air is getting chilly, the leaves are beginning to change color, and the rain has come back.  We love taking the children on walks around our city to observe these exciting things happening.  

Thank you very much for attending the Preschool Curriculum Night with your child’s teacher.  It sounds like you all received valuable information about your child’s day, the Montessori curriculum, and were able to ask the teachers things you were wondering about.  The teachers feel supported by you all and are so thankful that you were able to attend this important event.  

In October we are happy to have our amazing photographer, Chantel Allen, back to take individual and group photos of the children.  We are also looking forward to taking the preschoolers on their annual Pumpkin Farm Field Trip.  We will head to Craven Farm on October 26th – we hope you can join us for the ride on the yellow school bus and sludge around in the mud with us at the pumpkin farm!  

In October, teachers also offer Home Visits – a half hour visit at your home with parents, child, and teacher.  This is a wonderful opportunity for teachers and parents to discuss goals for children and for teachers to be able to see your child in their home setting.  These visits help teachers learn more about your child’s interests and can help strengthen the teacher-child connection.  Home visits are highly encouraged for all children who have entered a new classroom since last October.

At PFM, we celebrate Halloween by dressing up in our costumes and then preschoolers parade throughout our building to sing “spooky” Halloween songs to parents and some businesses.  Infants and toddlers are more than welcome to come dressed in costumes as well.  We will change all children back into their regular clothing before lunch time.  This has become a tradition here at PFM that the children just seem to love.  

Happy October everyone!

Teddi Blades

Reducing Your Child's Anxiety During Drop Off

Beginning a new school year can lead to excitement and anxiousness in both parents and children.  As teachers and support staff, we understand this and want to help ease this burden for both you and your child.  If your child cries at drop off, please know that this is completely normal and we will do all we can to help them feel safe and secure as they ease into their day.  If you would like a call or email from your child’s teacher to let you know your child has calmed down, please let the teacher know and we are happy to do this for you!  There is a good article on the healthychildren.org website that gives great advice on how to create a simple and supportive drop off routine for your child.  We highly encourage all parents to visit the link provided to this article to learn more about what separation anxiety is and the things you can do as parents to help your child through this.

Head of School Newsletter: September

Hello Pacific First Montessori families,

As Director and Owner of Pacific First Montessori, I am happy to welcome you to the 2017-2018 school year!  We are all excited to have our students back in the classrooms filling them with energy and excitement for learning.  The teachers have been working hard during our in-service days organizing, cleaning, attending meetings and setting up their classrooms – we think your children will be very impressed by what they see! 

I am happy to tell you about a few promotions that have taken place recently:  Keja Taylor is now our Assistant Director, Sarah Harper is our Montessori mentor for teachers (in addition to her South preschool lead teaching role), Katie Wright is our afternoon preschool art specialist, Starlina McKinny is the toddler afternoon art and movement coordinator, and Teresa Fomich is the infant afternoon art and movement coordinator/infant lead assistant.

We have a strong team of experienced, motivated and nurturing staff here at PFM and I am so thankful to all of them for their hard work in getting our new school year off to a great start!  We value our relationships with the families and the children here at PFM and are so happy that you choose to partner with us in your child’s early learning and development.  These truly are magical years for your children and we are happy to help them become life-long learners.

I can’t wait to greet you and your children on the first day of school and the many days after. 

Sincerely,
Teddi Blades

Contact

tblades@pacificfirstmontessori.com